This Is a Blog About Nothing.

When the hit show "Seinfeld" first came out, a lot of people asked the creators what the show was all about it.  Famously, Jerry Seinfeld told them, "Nothing! It's a show about nothing!"

What does that mean?!!?!

The show followed its cast of zany characters around New York with no real recurring plot line.  Every episode was like a snapshot of their daily lives.  You could (and can still) tune in without knowing what happened the episode the week, day or month prior.

I like for my blog to be the same way.

There's another reason I brought up NOTHING.

In my dreams, I am a tattooed, badass, mega-charity-supporting Ironman like Kristin McQueen, who trains in spit of my multiple illnesses, battles through my equilibrium challenges, sports my "MAking Cancer My Bitch" sign at marathons and Iron-distance races, and takes setbacks in stride because I have learned to make the best of, among many things, my overwhelming non-thyroid-having fatigue.  McQueen writes, "To me a survivor embraces what is in front of them with their entire being. That means feeling all the good and bad because we’re not human if we ignore the bad. However, that does not mean dwelling on the negative. My pity parties are not allowed to last more than one day. A survivor just accepts the added challenges and finds a way to do what they love despite them. It’s about not letting the disease invade your spirit . . . . Taking charge of your life is being a survivor." 

Or, I am a tattooed, badass, pint-sized, former-hockey-playing triathlon phenom like Heather Jackson, who came from a world where men dominated but was just too fiercely determined to not skate her socks off and beat them. Jackson, with her infectious grin and in-your-face New England pride, recently made her foray into triathlon and has been placing top 5 alongside seasoned pros now for about 3 seasons despite her lack of swimming or running background like most top female triathletes.

Apparently, in my dreams, I'm a tattooed badass.  (Does that mean I need more tattoos or more ass?!)

Seriously, though.   The recurring theme is that both of these women are atypical athletes, and instead of bemoaning it, they've both chosen to embrace it.

I could use a dose of their chutzpah this week.  I'm just having one of those weeks where I don't want to do ANYTHING.

NOTHING.

I don't want to swim, bike, or run.  I don't want to do yoga, soccer, pilates or weightlifting.  I want to do

NOTHING.

Last night was the worst.  I didn't think I felt too bad - I just didn't want to have anywhere to be.  I wanted to sit home on the couch sipping vino.

So I did what any good, non-motivated, sluggish athlete would do.

I dragged myself to Masters.

I swim Masters with all men.  It's really frustrating because they're so much faster and taller.  Add that to my general malaise and disorganization in the water and it's a recipe for an emo shitstorm.

Last night, after they all whipped my ass, and Coach made us do 400 back drills followed by 400 breaststroke drills, I almost cried.

I know, I know.

THERE'S NO CRYING IN SWIMMING

A lot of people tell me they have vertigo, or have had vertigo, or they know what it's like being dizzy.  I have it almost all the time, so I don't really know what it's like NOT to be dizzy.  But the only time I really notice it is in the water.  I'm sure there's lots of scientific evidence about why, so I'll let the research nerds among us look that up, but even on a great day on land, the water throws me for a loop.  But

I

EFFING

SUCK

AT

BACKSTROKE

I can pull a mean butterfly out of my you-know-what for maybe 50 yards and I love the way fly looks now that I can sort of do it. I am worse at breast because I can't do the legs right, and I will tell you I hate it for that reason, but backstroke really jacks with my vertigo.  I can't backstroke straight.  By 25 yards I don't know what country I'm in, and I get sick of shoving the lane lines away vehemently.  I've even almost puked in the water.

This morning, I got to thinking about what would HJ or McQueen do?

I'm sure they wouldn't do NOTHING.

I read HJ's race report about Vineman.  And I read one of McQueen's articles about being a survivor. And they reminded me of a few things:

It's ok to have a bad day . . .  as long as it's just a day and not your entire outlook/training plan/week. 

Looking back over a few years of progress can give you good perspective about where you currently are.

Wine can sometimes be an acceptable recovery drink.

 

Ok, so maybe I made the last one up :)

I had myself a nice "nothing" morning before work.  I swept, I blogged.  Things I don't normally do in the morning.  They'd make me crazy if I had them all the time, but sometimes a "nothing" morning is nice.

Happy Winesday.  Er, Wednesday.

Just Keep Swimming

HAPPY FRIDAY!   (I have a full weekend off, so I can say that.)

Tour de MOM is on Sunday! YAHOO!!!

I just raised the last of my $500 goal, but you are WELCOME to keep helping me out: http://main.diabetes.org/goto/megganann

Not to ignore the REAL focus of the month (SWIMMING) but to start out with,  here’s WTF happened on Wednesday’s ride.   



 My only two goals for this ride were to

1.       Drop the hammer

2.       Drop the hammer

(I was hoping to average 21)

I did not used to be a hammer-dropper.  Once the hammer-dropping commenced, I made myself scarce.  I avoided Hammerfests like the plague.  But, as I mentioned, I come to every workout now to work.  So, to facilitate said hammer-dropping, I started out at the front of the fast group. 



Thor's Hammer



The very front. 

(FYI: this is not something I’ve done . . . like . . . . ever.) 



I made it ¾ of the way to the turnaround with them.  We were probably going 24-26 the majority of this time (if not, faster).  I could only hold about 21, so me and one of the other guys teamed up on the way to the turnaround.  IT. WAS. WINDY!  The back group never caught us.

After a quick stop, we were back at it, and this time the front and back groups had merged.  It wasn’t long before the A riders were passing the back group.  And for a split second I wondered if I could keep up with the A group.  But in my head I kept hearing a voice in my head say let’s make it hurt! I came to work! (I hear voices when I go hard, leave me alone), so when I spotted the break . . .  I got on it.

Did she said she came to work again?  Oops.

I didn’t have the legs for their 28 mph pace, but I still felt strong.  I joined the back group with less than half of the return trip left.  We still worked really hard; the “fast” group averaged 21.5 and the “back” group averaged 20.   (To give you some perspective, last spring/summer the back group started out averaging about 17-18 and ended the summer averaging 19-20.  With some of the group with virtually NO outdoor training since like November, we STARTED this season averaging 20. Not 21, but I’ll take it.)

Then we headed back to the shop for a quick 5k run . . . a 10:37 pace right off the second or third fastest “training” ride of my life, thankyouverymuch! 



The other super-fast ride I’m trying to get on is the TNT ride.  (We have acronyms for everything – TNT, WTF, etc.)  TNT stands for Tuesday & Thursday, but it is also descriptive of the ride’s explosive pace.  It’s like a race.  There IS no “back group” for this ride – it attracts some of the strongest cyclists around.  It’s only 17 miles, but your only goal for the ride is to

1.       Drop the hammer

2.       Drop the hammer

So anyway, enough of this hammer-dropping. 

Back to SWIMMING.

Remember how I was told to bust my ass in the pool this month add an extra swim or an extra 1k to every swim I did?  I haven’t been able to swim 3 or 4 times, so I’ve been tacking a thousand yards onto my biweekly swims for a weekly yardage around 6-7000 yards. 

But there’s something you should know about my swimming.

It’s awful.

I mean, really, really AWFUL.

Like . . . . I used to look like I was swimming BACKWARDS.





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I didn’t learn to freestyle until 6 years ago when I started tri-ing.  Swimming frustrates me the way golf does: there are so many components to the stroke and swing that it’s easy to overthink them (but I love both, so I keep trying).  When I started making an effort to come to the Friday morning masters swim, I knew it was going to take me a long time to “get it.”  My first few masters swims, I was on the slower side.

Today, I finally figured something out.  Two somethings, really. 



1.       Just Keep Swimming.  The more yardage I put in, the better I get.

2.       I have to swim like I’m taller than I am.

 

The second one came to me this morning as I was swimming alongside a taller, slightly faster swimmer.  I noticed that she wasn’t reaching very far for someone with longer arms than mine. Then I remembered the day our masters coach was telling one of the newbies: You swim like a short person! Stretch out your arms!  And then it hit me: what if I swim like I’m not 4’11”?  Instead of focusing on a shorter, more powerful “pull,” I reached my arms out farther on each stroke, relaxed a little bit, and all of sudden she wasn’t faster anymore. 

Huh.  Ain’t that some $41t!

Can't wait to see what happens during APRIL, Run Focus Month.

Have a great weekend!!!