Walking Away

I'm walking away
From the troubles in my life
I'm walking away
Oh, to find a better day
-Craig David
 (disclaimer: actual children should probably not be reading my blog due to the salty language)
WOOHOO!! Lactate threshold testing week and marathon season ARE HERE!  (You won't hear me woo-hooing later when I actually have to do the LT tests.)
Thank GOD they weren't last week, though.  I can't believe I survived last week. Between recovery from vacation, work, and homework - it was what my one coworker calls "a shit show."
At work we're on deadline, and I spent about 16 hours on Saturday and Sunday alone working on a tough statistics assignment. It wasn't anything earth-shattering, it was just stuff I either haven't done in almost a year or haven't done yet.  So it was really hard to grasp from an online lecture. And this weekend I have another assignment like that, plus a project in my other class, AND I work 6 days of the week.  Plus marathon season starts.  Plus it's LT test week.
(Or not.)
Yesterday I announced that my blog address had changed to reflect my appreciation for my Mom, The (real) Original MAJ - but I have made it no secret that my Dad is also one of my biggest sources of inspiration.  It's funny how we go through different stages of attitudes toward our parents as we age.  We go from they don't know what I'm feeling to maybe they know more than I thought to they know everything, let me ask them their opinion.  Now, I've always been close to them, so my parents just don't understand phase was remarkably short, but I still appreciate them more than I did when I was younger.
Anyway, so at one point yesterday I finally just gave up on my homework. I was in tears of frustration, my head hurt and I felt incredibly stupid.  That's when I remembered my dad telling me a story about one of his bosses who made him walk away from a really urgent problem to clear his head.  When he sat down for coffee and relaxed a bit, the solution came to him, clear as day.
Now, no magical solutions about my stats problems actually came to me when I walked away from it for a while (and, admittedly, I had to walk away three times - once for breakfast, once for lunch, and once for dinner) - but, I certainly felt less frustrated and brain-fogged when I returned.
When you return, it never seems as bad as it was.

We tend to think of walking away as abandoning a goal or giving up, but sometimes, walking away isn't permanent, and walking away from other things in our lives can give us perspective.  For example, I've walked away from this blog a million times and came back to read it and think, oh crap, was that really how I felt that day? I've even had relationships from which I or the other person walked away. At the time that they ended, I felt like my world was turned upside down, but then later on I would see both myself and that relationship in a totally different light and be able to appreciate what it was and how it had contributed to my life (and even, in some cases, appreciate that it no longer existed). 
In 2010, I walked away from triathlon.  Yep, I thought my world would end.  I'd never tri again, I would get slow, I'd get fat, whatever, whatever.  But it ended up being the best decision I made. I was able to decide if triathlon was what I really wanted (it was), if Ironman and coaching was really my goal (nope), and come back with a new appreciation for being able to move my body.  (Of course, recovering from surgery and radioactive iodine helped with that too, but you get the picture.)
This blog is often my way of "walking away."  It lets me sit down and read other people's workout tales, jokes, and life experiences.  It lets me vent about my own. It helps me understand my own reasoning.
And then, when I return to real life, it somehow doesn't ever seem as bad as it was.
Yesterday I thanked my Mom for encouraging me to be an original (even when it sometimes makes you feel odd, or alone.)  Today I'd like to thank my Dad for teaching me the importance of perspective.
Now, it's time for me to walk away from this blog for a while and accomplish some other things.

1 tidbits of wizdom:

Alili said...

So glad that I have other ways to connect with you for a dose of MAJ. Walk away and accomplish big things girl!