I'm no hero.

Last night I asked a few of my closest friends and family, "ever since you've known me, have I always wanted to be superhuman?" The resounding answer, from all but 2 of them, was "yes."

What did the other two say? Well, one first asked, "As in Nietzsche, DC Comics, or the Borg?" (When I replied, "all 3," the answer was also "yes.") And the second replied, "No, but it's intensified over the last 3 years."

I beat myself up a lot. When I don't make workouts, when I don't make the race times I think I should make, when I don't make the grades I think I should make. When everyone else is talking about sports I love, and I don't know who the latest players are because I've been too busy with school and work and training and family. When I don't look how I'd like to look.

Basically, all the time.

Well, I've decided that I'm tired of trying to be a superhuman. I'm not a hero, after all. I'm a mere mortal. Yes, my mission is still to say retarded shit to make people laugh, inspire people, and get into just enough trouble to not get arrested - but it's not to be the best at anything. Or at everything.

It's just to be MY best. To do all I can, but to recognize when I have done all I could.

As IM Able told me the other day, "having momentum is good. Having control over your own monentum is gooder."

1 tidbits of wizdom:

Tea said...

Have you considered doing a plan like weight watchers?

I know of several marathoners who started out with the points program. The points program--I'm pretty sure that's what it's called: it gives you extra food for your activity.

You can even just do it online and not go to meetings.

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